Those 70ish Girls

CAN I PLEASE JUST COMPLAIN? By Valerie Halla

Call me old fashioned and sentimental. Call me late for dinner. Call me overly celebratory, but I recently bought fancy boxed cards, lots of them.

Getting in the spirit of the holidays. I’m starting to write Christmas Cards. I like to write a small message in each of the 50 plus cards I send out. This year I bought some lovely expensive cards. I wrote, addressed and stamped them and licked the flap on the back of the crisp new white envelope. The envelope would not, no matter how I tried, stick closed. I got mad. I complained loudly even though no one heard me. I’m pretty practiced at complaining. You could probably compliment me on my complaining skills. I wouldn’t complain.

Then I discovered that these classy high priced cards had thin white strips of sticky tape on the flaps of envelopes that you peeled off, then the envelope could be sealed. I felt a bit embarrassed but glad I figured it out after licking a few envelopes unsuccessfully. I licked and slurped a few of the tapes before seeing them. They were actually white tapes on white background so the camouflage concept worked.

Speaking of this whole Christmas card preparation thing, I used my list of people from two years ago and also last year to make sure I got everyone. I studied the names on the old lists as I settled down to working.

Then a few shocks struck me hard. I felt like I’d been hit in the heart and guts simultaneously as I studied the old lists. Could this be true?

From my old Christmas lists of 2022 and 2023 I read our nephew and his wife’s names. Sadly, tragically, he had taken his own life last year. Then I read my good friends’ and family members’ names who I had known for over 30 years. The kind husband, who I’d taught with for many years, had lost his wife last year after her 12 year battle with cancer ended. We group of teacher friends knew her for decades.

Another good friend on my list died this last August. She had been brought from Nazi Germany by her grandmother after going through pure hell during the war including losing her baby brother. She became a teachers aide at my school and helped scores of teachers and students for decades. She also volunteered at the school after retiring, to help kids learn and progress. She was a bright light in our lives and in her family.

It’s an odd feeling looking over lists of people whom you have known for years and been sending cards to for decades. You take them for granted. You want to send them a Christmas note like you always have except they no longer will receive your card, will no longer enjoy the quick note you wrote bringing them up to date on your life, because they no longer live. They just live in your memory and in your heart.

I’m glad to be writing cards. No use in complaining because when I’m gone, I won’t be on anyone’s list even Santa’s. Have a lovely holiday! I know I will be thankful beyond words. I’d better get back to work writing words and spreading good cheer, because complaining doesn’t help. Does it?