Murdo Girl…Arf reports

I told my writer to use today to beef up my story a little. I’ve been a little worried about her level of concentration. I hate to embarrass her, but a dog’s gotta do what a dog’s gotta do.

Do you know what she’s up to right now? She’s making a grilled cheese sandwich and chips for lunch. She had two pieces of peanut butter toast for breakfast. It’s only 8:00 a.m. If she does like she’s been doing, she’ll have her afternoon snack about noon. She has made a chocolate cake, walnut bars and banana bread in the past few days. This morning she weighed herself and screamed. Now she’s looking for sweatpants.

Do you see why I’m worried about my story? Bessie is worried too. She couldn’t believe it when she read her script and it said she had a milk cow named Bessie, too. We’ve seen that movie before with Pearl the human and Pearl the dog.

We just want you to know that from now on, we’re going to have more input.

I’m really sorry that you all have to be socially distant. I hope you’ve stocked up on bones and your dog has a few frisbees or a ball. It would be good if between meals you threw them to him or her. It might help keep the screams down.

BTW, I’m pretty sure your dog is sick of the news. Try Lassie or Rin Tin Tin. I’m not crazy about Old Yeller. It doesn’t end well.

Well, keep a stiff upper lip, your back to the wind and keep your tail wagging. Pray for your fellow human and don’t cut your bangs or bark up the wrong tree.

Arf the actor turned…

Arf Diehm, Reporter at large


Hey Arf! Someone by the name of Venus wants to talk to you.

Murdo Girl…A friend in need

After filling up his stomach with a plate of mashed potatoes and gravy, Arf became very tired. Feeling sorry for her unexpected guest, the little old lady put a folded blanket by her chair and called Arf to lie down and rest. Both drifted off to sleep. When she woke up, the lady realized she hadn’t called the number on Arf’s tag.

I’ll call first thing in the morning,” she said to the sleeping dog.

The lonely woman did not want to leave her friend and go to bed, but after making sure Arf had enough fresh water, and could get out the screen door if he needed to, she turned out the lights and went to bed.

Arf: I wondered if I was dreaming, because I do sometimes, but something woke me up. I heard a strange noise outside. I didn’t know what kind of animals the lady had, but I thought I should go outside and make sure everything was okay. The sound was coming from the chicken coop. I know what a chicken coop is. It’s where chickens hide their eggs. Sometimes dogs steal chicken eggs, but I don’t.


I could see something was trying to get the chickens. There must have been a hundred of the enemy…all against one (me). It took some time, but I finally sort of won. The enemy ran for their lives.

old lady

Arf: When I was walking back to the house, the lady came outside. When she saw me, she put her hands to her face and said, “Arf, what have you done?” And then she looked over by the hen house. By that time the sun was coming up so she could see better. Three of the bad guys were running up the road.

“Oh my goodness! You saved my eggs and they would have killed some of my chickens, too! Oh Arf. Now we must clean you up. What if it would have been me out there instead of you?”

Arf: The lady was so happy I decided I must have done a good thing. I didn’t even mind it when she poured stuff all over me and sprayed me with the hose.

“You saved the day, Arf. I promised twelve dozen eggs to the local market. I only have a few days left to collect them all. The kids will be wanting them to decorate for Easter.”

“Arf, I must call the phone number on your tag. Come here and let me see what it is again. By the way, my name is Bessie. I have a milk cow named Bessie, too.”
Arf: I could hear the lady talking on the phone, but I couldn’t hear what she was saying. When she hung up, she looked sad again.


“Good news, Arf,” she said.” Your owners are coming to get you. They have no idea how you could have gotten this far, but they were very grateful to learn you were okay. They won’t be able to get here for four or five days. I told them I would be happy to keep you here with me.”

Murdo Girl…The sad lady

Arf really hadn’t contemplated moving. He rather liked his humans. Nevertheless, he had accidentally gotten trapped in a moving van. When the movers reached their destination and opened the door, Arf made a run for it and soon found himself out in the country near a river. He was getting pretty hungry and the only thing he could find was polka dotted animal food and bird food. Neither looked good, so he decided to look around a little bit more.

I see some cats over there. Cat food sounds a little better than what I’ve seen so far. Some cats don’t like me, but I’m going to have to take a chance.

Alf and cats

I don’t think that black cat likes me, and I don’t see any food over here anyway. I sure do smell something good. I wonder if this place has a human. I usually only smell good food when there’s a human around. Wait! There’s a door.

Arf’s mouth was watering. He had to see where that good smell was coming from, so he went through the open door and found a plate of roast beef on a little table. It lasted about two minutes.

I ate the beef and the potatoes, but I left the beans for the human. I went back out the same way I came in. Now what was I going to do? Where would I go? How could I get back home? I’m a smart dog. I can fetch a frisbee, sit and lay down on command, but I don’t know how to get home.

As I wondered what to do, I saw an old woman working in the garden. I hid behind a bush and watched her for a while.

old woman in garden

Pretty soon she brushed herself off and walked back to the house. She had a sad look on her face. I felt bad that I had eaten her beef. She looked like she might like me, so I came out from my hiding place just as she was walking up to the door.

“WHERE DID YOU COME FROM!” She yelled! “You scared me half to death. I must sit and calm myself down.”

Did she say sit? I wanted her to like me, so I walked over to her and sat. Just to add a little cuteness, I also held my paw up and smiled. Well, as much as a dog can smile.

She looked at me for a long time, but she didn’t smile back. I whined just a little. Then I laid down and put my head between my paws. If that didn’t get to her, nothing would. I whined a little one more time. Then I scooted over to her rocking chair.

Finally, she bent down to pat me on the head.

“What’s your name, fella? You sure are a pretty boy? I haven’t seen you around here before. Will you let me look at your tag?”

I didn’t know what the lady was saying, but she seemed nice enough. Why oh why did I eat her beef?

“So your name is Arf. It appears there is an address and phone number…Oh, goodness. This can’t be right. You can’t possibly be that far from home. Come inside and I’ll get you some water and something to eat. You must be starving to death”

Since she was going to find out I ate her beef, I thought about making a run for it, but it was getting dark and I decided I was just going to have to be on my best behavior and see what happened.

“Well Mr. Arf, it looks like you have already made yourself at home. I take it you don’t like my string beans.”

She had seen the plate. She knew I had eaten the delicious beef and the white stuff. Desperate dogs do desperate things. Now what?

“Well, you were most likely desperate,” she said.

“I’ll warm up some gravy and give you the remainder of the potatoes. Then, I will call the number on your tag. Somebody must be missing you.”

She liked me and she didn’t look so sad anymore.

old woman washing vegetqbles

Murdo…It’s time

This is a moment to show kindness, give comfort, and pray.

This is a moment to encourage, and send love someone’s way

Moment to moment is the way we live our lives.

Though sometimes it seems to, time never really flies.

If something good is soon to happen, we think that time is slow.

We might say time is dragging, but it really isn’t so.

Time does pass… and you might ask where it has gone.

And your minute is my minute. Now are you catching on?

You might hear someone say, “I don’t have the time for that.”

You have the same as everyone. That’s what I’m getting at.

Watching the time is silly. It’s time that you will waste.

And here’s another thing. Time cannot be chased

Yes a moment is a moment that won’t come your way again.

But if you use it wisely, you will like where it has been.

We can help those who are hurting. There are many we can reach.

And I think it’s about time I practice what I preach.

Murdo Girl…This land is your land

Can you believe that 80,000,000 people in the United states are mandated to stay home? Everyone else seems to be supporting the need to follow suit. It really seems surreal and not right at all. I remember when I was little, our mothers worried about polio. I was sure it was just a matter of time before I was stricken with the dreaded disease. For a while, I even willingly took a nap because Mom said I would be very susceptible to getting polio if I was too tired. She also drilled into me that I shouldn’t get my feet wet. Cold, wet feet were a breeding ground for polio.

My other big fear was Nikita Krushchev’s red phone. I somehow got the idea that if he was really, really mad at us, he could pick up his red phone, dial our number, and blow us all up. Russia was the only other country I even thought about.

I was very superstitious when I was a kid. I still don’t step on the sidewalk cracks. Step on a crack and you’ll break your mother’s back. I lost Mom several years ago, but I can’t get it out of my head that something bad might happen, and why take chances? Don’t walk under a ladder, and don’t let a black cat walk in front of you. If you break a mirror, you’ll have seven years of bad luck.

I never hear about superstitions anymore. I only hear that I have to stay six feet away from people and not be around more than ten at a time. There can be no hugs and I can’t touch my face. I must use hand sanitizer and wash my hands several times a day. Everything that’s not nailed down and some that are, must be disinfected, often. I have to do all of this or I might get really sick or make someone else really sick. I can’t begin to imagine what all the children are feeling and thinking right now.

I wish kids, especially, didn’t have to go through this. I remember making an ugly face at my mother, once. She told me that someday my face would freeze like that. I believed her. Even though kids aren’t as susceptible to this virus as adults are, it has to be mentally unsettling to say the least.

We’re being tested. I know I’m supposed to help take care of my fellow man. How can I help someone who doesn’t have a home where they can shelter in place, or food to eat. Our Congress can’t seem to answer that question. Isn’t that what they’re there for? Weren’t they elected to help the people who elected them? The American people are doing their part. Why can’t our elected officials get it!!!

I vowed a long time ago that I was not going to use my blog to express my political views, but I do have some ideas that I would like to throw out there.

I think lobbying should be outlawed. It’s the ones that make the biggest campaign contributions that congress fights for. Money equals power.

They, (congress), shouldn’t be able to spend our money to hold hearings that last for years. It should all be spent to keep this country running in a way that’s good for the people. We need to support businesses, large and small, that can employ people and put money back into the economy. We need better schools. Do they still teach civics?

I know I’ve simplified things, and it’s probably not fair to throw the same blanket over everyone. I’m just speaking some of my thoughts on Congress as a whole… both Democrats and Republicans. Why do I get the feeling that they’re not working for us.

I heard their jobs are pretty tough, but even though they don’t make extremely high salaries, a big percentage of them leave office, usually at a very old age, extremely wealthy…oh, and I think they have good insurance…and maybe a pension….and they very seldom even have to make an important decision.

All I can say is, “What happened to, This land is your land. This land is my land. From the Redwood Forests to the New York Harbor.”

Murdo Girl…A lie with lipstick on it is still a lie.

Just because someone said it, doesn’t make it true.

Still everything I hear, I pass on to you.

You tell someone else who has proof that verifies…

What I’ve said is wrong. It’s just a pack of lies.

So I get on the internet and google what’s disputed.

You really didn’t know what you said has been refuted?

The issue is no longer who is wrong or who is right.

It’s our stupid ego that keeps us in the fight.

I must convince the world (or everyone I know),

That you are pathological and say what isn’t so.

You stomp your feet and pound your fist.

You vow to make me pay for this.

Bring it on, I say. I know I’ll win this one.

(I’ve got a lot more lies where all of those came from.)

You sit there at the table. You think you’re well prepared.

I believe another’s lies and hope that you’ll run scared.

Has honesty been lost to the cleverest deception?

The world is suffering. Do you think there’s a connection?

If I’m truthful I’ll admit

There are times that I forget.

Just because someone said it, doesn’t make it true.

Believe in your Higher Power who leads us to the truth and replaces ego with humility.

Murdo Girl…Arf takes a trip

My pink frisbee just flew up the ramp and into the big truck. I ran to get it because that’s what dogs do. All of a sudden it got dark inside that truck. I sniffed around and found my frisbee, but I couldn’t see the door and the ramp. We were moving! Oh, no…we were moving and I was in the dark. I wanted to go home. Please…someone open the door so I can take my pink frisbee and go home.


My name is Arf and it looks like I’m moving with my people. Wait! my people aren’t moving. This truck was down the street. Someone else is moving. I wonder if they like dogs. I don’t think I know those people.

I usually don’t get out the front door. I wasn’t going to stay outside. I just wanted to see what was out there. I was getting ready to go back in when I lost my frisbee. I didn’t really lose it. A gust of wind blew it away.

Alf spent two days in the moving van. He was surrounded by box after box in the front, and several pieces of furniture were stacked clear in the back. As his eyes got used to the dark, he could see where he was going during the day, but it was pitch black during the two long nights.


I found a case of water that was different from any water I ever drank out of my bowl. When I bit into the bottle to get a drink, it fizzed all over the place. If this was my house, I would for sure be in trouble for getting the couch all wet. It was also too bad because I was thinking of spending the night on that comfy couch. There was no one there to scold me. I could do anything I wanted to. Anything except go home.

On the end of the 2nd day, the truck finally arrived at it’s destination.

It seemed like forever before the men opened the door. I didn’t know if I could trust them, so I stayed way in the back behind the wet couch. I can usually tell when a human likes me and when they don’t. I hoped they would go away soon. I was really hungry and I had to find a place to do my business.

couch in moving van 2

They didn’t like me. They yelled at me so I grabbed my frisbee and ran down the street. I ran and ran and ran until I was far away from there.

But where was I? All I could see was house after house and they all looked the same. I found a place to solve my first problem, but I still couldn’t find anything to eat. It felt like my stomach was hitting my backbone. I was getting weak.

Oh, No! I ran out of houses! I’m in a place where I can’t find one house. Should I go back? There’s a road. I guess I’ll keep going. I wish I knew how to fish. Dogs don’t eat garden stuff which doesn’t matter because I don’t know where I can find a garden. There’s water up ahead. I’ll drink some water and rest a while. Dogs take a lot of naps. I’ll take a nap.

When I woke up, I knew I had to find something to eat, but where? My people had always given me a bowl of food and a bone at night. How many nights had it been? There was nothing to do but keep on walking.

Soon I came to a place that had some animals that I had never seen before. Was that food they were eating? Would they share?

On the other side of the yard I saw a bird. I know what birds are, but this one was eating out of a big pan. Should I ask the polka dotted animals if I could have some of their food, or should I ask the bird? None of it looked like dog food, but beggars can’t be choosers and I know how to beg.

Murdo Girl…Mt. Moriah Cemetery

They say you can learn a lot about a town by who’s buried in the cemetery.

Some of those buried at Mt. Moriah were really quite legendary.

I walked silently through all the sections. I knew who I was looking for.

They buried the unknown in Potter’s field with those who were very poor.

A large section is filled with those who died in a tragic lumber mill fire.

I found the graves of children of misfortune, madams, and a gun for hire.

I finally came to the two I had to see.. Wild Bill Hickok and Calamity Jane.

Calamity Jane

I heard they were romantically involved but true love they couldn’t attain.

Calamity Jane at Wild Bill’s grave

Wild Bill’s friends made a promise to him that someday when he died,

They wouldn’t bury Calamity near him. I see they must have lied.

Calamity outlived him by twenty-seven years. She’s buried on the hill.

She insisted she be buried at Mount Moriah Cemetery right next to Wild Bill.


So now they’re together for eternity, much to Wild Bill’s probable chagrin.

Shot in the back while playing poker…with a dead man’s hand he couldn’t win.

Wild Bill
Jack McCall shoots Wild Bill Hickok

Mt Moriah Cemetery is in Deadwood, South Dakota

Murdo Girl…See ya later alligator

This morning as I drank my coffee… activator

I decided it was time to clean my… refrigerator


It turns out I should have watched a… demonstrator

Putting the shelves back in right was an… aggravator

I couldn’t ask my “smarter than I am”…next door neighbor


To come to my house and do me just a… little favor

We’re keeping our social distance for…the remainder

Of the time it takes to rid us of this… health invader

We all have to strive to be a good… cooperator


And listen to the updates on the… common denominator

This virus will be under control… sooner or later

This is what I get for being a… procrastinator

I’m trying not to become a…refrigerator hater

To those who have suffered through… so much greater

I’m sending lots of prayers for you… to our Creator


A picture my son took this morning in Wyoming