I feel bad. Today I told Mom her teeth are yellow. She was getting onto me about brushing my teeth, and I said, “Well, my teeth are whiter than yours!” I expected her to say something back, but she didn’t. Of course my teeth are whiter. Her teeth are thirty-one years older than mine are. I couldn’t really tell her that now could I? Then, I got the bright idea to make a tent out of a TV tray and a blanket, and sleep out in the front yard. It works pretty good. You can actually use two TV trays if you have a big enough blanket. You have to be able to stretch the blanket over the trays and pound a clothespin into the corners, and then into the ground. Don’t ever plan on sleeping two people in a one TV tray tent.
I got myself all set up, and I thought everything would be fun. It got dark kind of early. I have a flashlight, but what fun is it to lay there in your front yard under a TV tray tent all by yourself, without anybody to even talk to? I don’t have a dog. Billy has a cat named Yappy, but she hides up in the attic above the garage all the time. She only comes down when she brings her kittens to us. She’s friends with Pete Reese’s tomcat. Pete is the old man who lives next door. He has a tomcat we call Tommy. The cat got his tail partially frozen off one bad winter. I personally don’t think cats are all that much fun. We kept one of Yappy’s kittens once and named him Tinkerbell. After he got bigger, he ran off somewhere and didn’t come back for a whole year. Cats aren’t fun, but they must be smart to know how to get around like that.
You know, I’m just laying here thinking. I really don’t know Pete Reese very well. If he lets his cat’s tail get frozen off, who knows what he might do to a kid who’s laying outside under a TV tray tent? The ground is getting hard on me. Dad never got around to planting grass, so I’m laying here on prickly weeds. What a dumb idea this was. Mom should have told me, no. She’s probably still in there feeling self-conscious about her yellowing teeth. Maybe I should just go in and finish this night out in my bed. I sure hate to admit defeat. On the other hand, how are you going to know if something will be fun unless you try it out? I could just say I tried it out and it wasn’t fun. It’s not like I just got scared and went in. I stayed out here quite a while and I’m also without food and water.
Shoot, I forgot to go to the bathroom before I came out here. What if I fall asleep and have to go inside the house and go to the bathroom in the middle of the night? I’ll have to leave my TV tray tent unprotected. I don’t have any idea how long it’s been since somebody changed the batteries in this flashlight.
I feel sorry for Mom. What if something happens to me? She’ll spend the rest of her life blaming herself, because she started this whole chain of events when she confronted me about my teeth. Do you know how long a person should tryout an idea like sleeping outside in a TV tray tent, without food and water, and a flashlight with unknown battery life? I don’t think we have another flashlight so Mom can’t check on me even if she wants to. I shouldn’t be so thoughtless.
Oh no… I’m going to have to go inside. I just remembered something. I forgot to brush my teeth.
Those 70ish Girls 