Month: August 2024

Those 70ish Girls

Valerie Halla2 Comments

LIVING ABOVE THE STORE by Valerie Halla

BACK IN THE DAY AT SANDERSONS STORE. Apartment staircase is to the left of building. Post Office is on the right where you can see an outside mailbox.

If those old creaky walls could talk, record conversations and take pictures, we would know a lot. We would know who lived and loved above Sanderson’s Store and who visited there and what they had for breakfast, lunch and dinner. We could see the styles the women and men wore in the 1930’s and on past the 1960’s. We could see what furniture they had and hear conversations and maybe arguments. It would be eye opening. I would love it.

I would finally get to see the cat that occupied the room above the store forever called, “The Cat’s Room”. It was a small room at the back of these two apartments above the store. That has intrigued me for decades as its mystery has for many in our family. I heard that the store cat hung out there and caught mice to keep the area clean especially out back of the store in a low warehouse building. Cousin Billy said they passed candy up to him through the floor grate to the Cat’s Room when he was a kid. Maybe Billy can fill us in on the true story. What happened in that tiny room will maybe forever be lost and what happened to the cat, too.

As a young boy, Billy used to be dropped off at the bottom of the long steep stairs next to the store that led to the apartments where Grandma and Grandpa lived after they purchased the store from previous owners. His Mom and Dad, my Aunt Loretta and Uncle Bill, sometimes wouldn’t even tell Grandma and Grandpa Sanderson that they were dropping little Billy off for the weekend. My parents lived in the front apartment after the war and heard Billy’s suitcase thumping and banging along as he dragged it on up the stairs, excitedly calling out, “I get to stay all weekend!” My young Dad who had lived through landing on the beach in the Pacific as a Marine in WWII, getting wounded and receiving a Purple Heart in the military hospital, would groan and think to himself: “Oh, no, now I’ll have to entertain this active pesky little kid while Grandpa takes his long nap.” It would seem like a long weekend but later everyone laughed about it, and my Dad eventually escaped and went off to go work downstairs at the store to escape.

My cousin Mary told me that all the holidays were spent at that apartment above the store when Grandma and Grandpa Sanderson lived there. The family got together for all those special times to celebrate together.

One thing I liked about living above the store later in the early 1960’s was being able to see people coming and going all day long to get their mail since the Post Office was right next door. We looked out the front windows steadfastly. You could also see who was going into Mack’s Cafe and to the bank and other stores. It was like the news feed of smalltown Murdo lifestyle. Who is that arriving in their new Ford pickup? Why is that person going into the bank with a bag bulging then coming out with no bag? Who’s holding hands with the Homecoming Queen? I wonder what Mrs. Foster is saying to Aunt Emily SANDERSON down there on the corner!

Then there were Saturday nights. Lots of young people came to see the movies or show. They would often stop by Sanderson’s Store to buy candy and gum before walking across the street to the tiny theater. Or they would go eat hot beef sandwiches at Mack’s Cafe for dinner out. I got pretty excited to see my cousins and friends since I was an only child. You could see a movie or two for twenty-five cents back then. My Dad and Aunt Tet liked seeing all the young people come into the store. They both got along great with kids and could chitchat with them. My Dad teased one group of young guys who drove up and down Main Street over and over saying they were going to wear down the pavement. They all wore brand new black cowboy hats. He called them “The Black Hat Gang”.

Such a lot of excitement for a small South Dakota Prairie Town. Then there was the weather. My Dad said during one bleak nasty blizzard, he went to sleep in the front room bedroom which was directly above Main Street with his glass of water on the nightstand. In the morning the water had turned to solid ice. You could often see your breath as you got up early to get ready for school or work.

Many windy days we would feel the old building swaying back and forth. That would make us pause. The old heating stove kept one room warm but the rest were like a refrigerator. There were no rugs nor carpet but painted boards as a border around a section of linoleum made in a flowery pattern to mimic an area rug.

The biggest attraction to most of us younger people was the back roof behind the two apartments which led farther out to a dusty tentative alley. We young cousins would sunbathe out there although you would need a blanket or towel because the surface of the back roof was rough material like roofing. We would also have birthday celebrations out there although I think just to eat our homemade cake and some ice cream was the only goal, taking the mess out of the small apartment.

BILLY AND ME OUT ON THE FLAT ROOF IN BACK OF THE STORE APARTMENTS- early 1950’s.

I hold happy memories and thoughts of those later days in 1961, living above the store with Aunt Tet quietly living across the hall and sharing the one bathroom with her. Grandma and Grandpa had moved to a house down south of the highway where Aunt Loretta and Uncle Bill had lived. Aunt Tet and my Dad worked together but my Mom was the closer one to Tet. My Mom would make extra chicken pot pie or spaghetti for dinner and have me take it over to Aunt Tet. She was always polite but never said too much. Even so, we felt better having our relative so close to us.

All of those things are what made living above the store a part of my young life at 12 and 13. I had lived there as a baby also but we moved to Pennsylvania when I was about age three but I don’t remember that stage of my life. Still it was a part of me. It grounded me in my new place and let me see others going about their lives. It made it easy to connect with family because everyone lived within walking distance in our small town. Plus a lot of Murdo’s people came to the store regularly.

I am so grateful to have lived in Murdo, above Main Street at the time and a great place my family had the opportunity to experience. It was formative. It was enlightening. It was lovely. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Thank you to those old walls in the walk up apartments we called home years ago.

A VIEW FROM THE SIDE THE WAY SANDERSON STORE LOOKED MANY YEARS AGO.

Those 70ish Girls…Let me count the ways.

Mary Francis McNinch2 Comments

I’m about to state something profound. The older you get, the more people have passed before you. That’s not meant to be depressing. It’s the memory of people that keeps them alive. Remember the Maya Angelou saying? “People won’t remember what you said or did, but they will always remember how you made them feel.” The best thing ever is being made to feel loved.

I remember when our daughter, Heidi was a teenager, she made the comment that her dad told her he loved her by changing the oil in her car. She was right to observe that. Back then, Kip was not prolific with the, “I love yous,” he says it much more often, now. Regardless, sometimes it’s the things you do that say I love you much more loudly than what you say.

Our anniversary was a few days ago and Kip came home from the store with a box of chocolates. I felt badly that I hadn’t gotten him anything. In all fairness, he just had a birthday, and I did get him a gift. Anyway, I had spent the morning making him sugar-free oatmeal raisin cookies. He is trying to watch his weight and is pre-diabetic. That was showing him I love him, right?

I feel like I’m preaching what everybody already knows. Just remember the things you do speak to people. Sometimes they can say I love you, and sometimes they can say, I’m just not that into you. Also, remember when you’re gone, people are going to remember how you made them feel, loved a lot, or not so much.

We tell our small children and pets we love them by talking baby talk to them. “Mummy wuvs you witto feetie.” Or, “Rylie is a dood boy.” I often wonder how our kids grow up to talk right. “Her is a good girl and him is mummy’s biggest little man.”

Me with my dad and oldest son. Dad made me feel loved by holding my hand.

Do something today to make someone feel loved, appreciated, and respected. It will make you feel good, too.

Those 70ish Girls…Aunt Tet

Featured2 Comments

GREAT AUNT TET WAS GREAT by Mary McNinch and Valerie Halla

Mary and I decided to ask our cousins what they remember about one of our Grandpa Sanderson’s sisters who saw most of us 13 cousins grow up. We are writing about her today because we have overlooked her while we have covered many family members, neglecting to offer dear memories of her.

We asked several cousins to tell us what they recall about “Aunt Tet” and will include their thoughts along with our own recollections of her.

Cousins Bobby, Suanne, Blake and Jeff H. met recently at the Martin Mason Hotel in Deadwood, South Dakota on July 9, 2024 and had these memories of Tet:

Great Aunt Tet was a lifelong loving younger sister of her brother, Maynard Evan Sanderson. She was a true, dedicated professional business partner and manager of the Sanderson General Store in Murdo for much of the time her brother and later his son, Jeff Sanderson, owned the store. She resided in the second story apartment above the store.

The involvement and support of various family members was truly recognized and was highly appreciated in the Sanderson family.

She was born in Burgess, Iowa in 1890. The town was unofficially known as Smithtown in Sharon Township.

She was one of twelve children fathered by Frank Sanderson. His first wife was Ella Current Sanderson. Their first two children, Mabel and Eben, died of a highly contagious disease prior to the birth of Maynard Evan Sanderson in June 1886. Frank had four children by his second wife. He died tragically in 1918.

Aunt Tet never owned nor operated a motorized vehicle. She was thought to have been a teacher in her early years with two years of advanced schooling in Iowa. She never drank nor smoked nor swore. Our cousins that day during their mini-reunion remembered her to be very pleasant and professional.

When the out-of-town relatives visited South Dakota, they weren’t accustomed to the severe Great Plains direct sunlight, Aunt Tet was quick to assure them that we all knew where to find wide-brimmed hats to protect from sunburn. The SANDERSON cousins concluded that day that, “Our dermatologists are still smiling on their way to the bank.”

COUSIN ANDREA’S THOUGHTS:

Cousin Andrea emailed her recollections to me of Aunt Tet in June of this year. She wrote:

When I think back on Aunt Tet, I remember her making caramel apples for Halloween. She would hang them on a rope clothesline with clothespins, just off the kitchen and they looked delicious.

She loved sports and watched the games at Grandpa and Grandma’s house on Sunday afternoon. She would ride down to their house after church and have Sunday noon meal. Then she usually walked back home as she enjoyed the exercise uphill to her apartment on Main Street.

I don’t remember her being vocal about things, rather she was interested and thoughtful.

MY MEMORY OF AUNT TET:

During our summer visits to Murdo and living there for my 7-8th grade years in school, I remember seeing Aunt Tet in her apartment hallway going in and out of the bathroom because during those two years, we lived in the front apartment above Sanderson Store while she lived across in the back apartment. We shared the one bathroom. She kept to herself mostly. She seemed shy and of the personality where you didn’t speak until spoken to.

She was always at the store working or on a raised platform at a desk doing paperwork and it seemed quite dark and mysterious when I would see her there at the back of the old store, bent over heavy account books or maybe writing something.

She wore sensible print shirtwaist dresses with narrow belts, and practical heavy shoes, and she had short gray hair and old fashioned glasses. She wasn’t slim nor heavy but solidly built. She would smile at 12-13 year-old me and make pleasant small talk. My mom made extra dinner for her and I took it over to Aunt Tet- homemade chicken pot pie or ham and bean soup or fried chicken with mashed potatoes. Sometimes even pie, fantastic, scrumptious home baked fruit pies, or tapioca pudding.

My mom, named after Tet’s own mother, and everyone in our family and Murdo respected and liked her. One guy named Tuffy would come in for a banana or a snack from his shift at the auto museum. He had no teeth and ate soft foods, and he would tease her calling her an “old maid”. She would snap back, “ Old bachelor!” Or maybe she would shorten it to “old batch”. My Dad, who also worked at the store for two years, laughed at that.

AUNT TET WITH HER MOTHER, BROTHERS AND SISTERS WITH TWO OF THEIR SPOUSES. TET IS SECOND FROM THE LEFT.

It was sad when Sanderson Store had to close. Aunt Tet decided to move back to her home town in Iowa to live near her relatives. She adored her brother Sandy who lived in Iowa. In 1971 my new husband and I honeymooned across country and stopped to stay with her overnight. She was a gracious kind person and took us the next morning to her sister’s, my Great Aunt Melitha’s house, for a large hot breakfast Iowa style. We drove off the next morning after our goodbyes and I wrote her letters for many years but never saw her again. She passed away in the later 1970’s close by to where she had been born.

VALERIE, HUSBAND KEN AND AUNT TET- WEARING A LIGHT ROBE- UNDER LOVELY OLD TREES IN A SMALL TOWN IN IOWA IN THE SUMMER 1971.

MEMORIES FROM BILLY FRANCIS:

I worked with Aunt Tet for four summers in Sandersons Store.  The first thing we did when we got to work was to discuss the baseball games we had listened to (Aunt Tet – Kansas City, Bill – St Louis Cardinals).  She and I were huge baseball fans!  Aunt Tet was also a fan of Murdo sports.  She went to every basketball (home game) and most of the road games if she could get a ride.

She was the bookkeeper for grandpa Sanderson and later Uncle Jeff until he closed the store.  

Aunt Tet took the last lunch hour because she didn’t want to miss the kids when they stopped off for their penny candy on their way back to school from lunch.  She knew all of the kids by name!

Aunt Tet was my best friend.  She was the first person I visited when I came home from college.  I truly loved that lady!

Aunt Tet never married. She was an amazing part of our family and greatly loved by family and the people of Murdo.

A big thank you to all our cousins who contributed to memories of Great Aunt Tet. Let us know if you have anything to add, you who were fortunate to have known her.

Those 70ish Girls

Valerie Halla2 Comments

ONCE A JOKESTER ALWAYS A JOKESTER

Valerie Halla

THAT IS THE FUNNIEST JOKE EVER!

When I was teaching elementary school, about 16 years ago, a couple great teachers had playground duty with me each Friday at 8:00 am sharp. We were always excited because the weekend was coming and we got a break from the routine. The two teachers and I came up with a joke plan. We decided we would each share a new joke every Friday. We even had another teacher who we liked, come out onto the yard to tell us a joke now and then and he did not even have an 8:00 am scheduled recess duty. He just liked us because we were laughing so much. So our joke challenge started. It would be an end of week challenge to make the other two laugh. Sometimes we would retell jokes, but that was all right with us because we had forgotten the joke and it would seem fresh enough to laugh again like mad.

I’m still close friends to this day with these now retired teachers and we are all in our 70’s, and we still tell jokes, silly ones, short ones, long winded complicated jokes, you name it.

As I care for my husband who has brain cancer, I am realizing how powerful and helpful laughter can be although it’s not a cure. Jokes, humor and giggles are a stress reliever. They can get his mind off his health. A sense of humor goes a long way in taking him to a fun place even temporarily. Relief from pain, anxiety and stress can come in the form of a belly laugh and sharing silliness. I got the idea to have him join the elderly jokesters.

COFFEE? NO THANKS. I ALREADY HAVE A DRINK.

In fact, I set up coffee or lunch meetups with these two friends and my husband often goes with us using his walker to get around . He starts smiling as soon as the joking and goofy stuff starts. He is lifted up and away from the depression, isolation and stress of his cancer and the immunotherapy treatments, blood tests, doctor appointments, medical advice, and all that. They are gone while we tell jokes and laugh.

It’s a laugh fest with a group of 70ish old timers telling jokes and sharing funny stories like this:

“Where does a bad rainbow go?” One friend starts after greetings and coffee orders are placed.

“I don’t know! Where?”

“To the prism so it can reflect on what it’s done.”

…Laughs and coffee all around.

“Hey, my first therapist said I am too vindictive! Well,” punching my one fist into the palm of my other hand, “we will see about that.” My friends burst out in laughter, knowing I’m just making this all up as I go.

Take another shot of coffee.

Then I continue, “My new therapist says I am overly condescending.” Then I turn and look down my nose at everyone seated around the table. “That means I talk down to people.”

We also tell true funny stories about our lives which are even better than a made up joke. Our good pal, whose wife passed away about a year ago, gave us his recollections of driving a rented camper through New Zealand on a trip with his wife many years ago. She was driving and naturally the driver’s seat is on the opposite side of the vehicle from American vehicles. They came to a one way bridge over a deep ravine. In New Zealand on a one way bridge, you allow the car which arrives first to cross. His wife looked then drove over the narrow bridge, but she could not find the brake as they were speeding along. She drove up one side of the bridges edge then criss-crossed over driving up onto the other side. They were careening all around the edges of this bridge. His wife had on big boots and she was flailing in the oversized boots screaming out: “WHERES THE BRAKE PEDAL? HELP!”

He said he just thought to himself : we are going to die right here on this one lane bridge. He was speechless. He tried not to look.

Finally his wife found the brake pedal and slowed down. She just looked over at him and calmly said, “Everything is under control” as she kept on driving.

He told us in conclusion, “I drove the entire rest of that trip.” We knew he held that special time deep in his heart because it was a memory of a trip with his wife of 54 years. He laughed as he told it.

WE’LL ALWAYS HAVE PARIS.

There’s nothing real funny in CASABLANCA but the scene in the market place with the guy lowering his prices as Ingrid Bergman’s character shops, gives me a smile every time.

“I gotta go to the bathroom. Too much coffee. Wait…”

“Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go potty in the middle of the forest?“

“Why?”

“Because the pee is silent.”

The jokes roll on.

“I’ve been frustrated shopping for a camouflage jacket. I can’t find one anywhere.”

This one is kinda mean:

“What does DNA stand for?”

“I dunno!“

“National Association for Dyslexia.”

~~ So if you’re having a down day or someone you know is sad and needs help, tell them a joke or ask them their favorite joke. Best of all, get out for a meetup with friends. They say, “Laughter is the best medicine.” I think that’s true. Socializing also helps.

By the way, I am running out of jokes, so please send me some or let’s meet soon for a jokester chat.