Those 70ish Girls

All of Murdo is still in shock! The first Lone Wolf County Convention ended last night. It was certainly a night like none other. I’ll try to sum up the events of the evening as briefly as I can.

Wait…There is More

Then Finally

 Barney got busted, Yram and Brad got busted, The balloons didn’t get busted

The next day Mr. Deryk, the Janitor was about ready to leave the Harold Thune Auditorim, when Treason caught up with him.

Treason: Excuse me Mr. Deryk, I’m Teresa, the liaison to the Murdo Coyote. People call me Treason. I thought the Lone Wolf County Convention was last night. Why are all the balloons still up in the rafters? You sure did get the place cleaned up in a hurry. I just stopped by looking for the Queen. Have you seen her today?

Mr. Deryk: Let me try to answer your questions Treason as briefly as I can. About an hour into the program, and before the voters/delegates/whatever even got to find out how the votes tallied up, this whole place spontaneously  combusted. Barney was accused of having several friends of the female persuasion.  Angelina Jolie came and dragged Brad Pitt off, but not before she let Miss Yram have it. Thelma Lou and Louise took off in their car and looked to be headed West, right behind Brad and Angelina. The Queen got here right about then. She looked real pretty in her orange outfit. Anyway, she and A I left to go over to Ferns to eat some cake. I’m not sure where Deputy Fife went. I think he went with Otis, probably over to the jail. Neither one of them looked so good.

Treason: Thanks a bunch Mr. Deryk, I guess I’ll check at Fern’s and the Jailhouse before I go on to the Coyote Office.

Treason runs into Jerry, the Bean Counter who is trying to sell hard boiled eggs labeled as Whole Boneless Skinless Chickens. He doesn’t seem to be drawing much of a crowd. Speaking of drawing, I wonder where Sherri the photographic drawer is?

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Meanwhile, over at the Murdo Girl Campground Compound, Murdo Girl is having her free continental breakfast with Lav who’s finally feeling better after a severe bout of crownitis. The Doctor told her to quit wearing her crown to bed and to get a fan for some ventilation in her pop up camper. Some of the Penticoff family stopped by to say hello and talked about what happened at Fern’s after the convention busted up. Sherri, the Photographic drawer is photographic drawing everybody.

Murdo Girl: Say Pat…I heard everybody was going over to Fern’s Cafe last night after the convention for some homemade chocolate cake. Tell me, did Barney get his 300 votes from the voters/delegates/whatever?

Pat: What rock did you sleep under last night Murdo Girl. It would take too much time to explain everything that happened. Just have Sherri show you the pictures. You’ll be able to figure out that the final vote count tally never did get announced. I’d be real surprised though if poor old Barney made it. Except….

Murdo Girl: Except what Pat? What do you mean except?

Pat: Except everybody voted at intermission, and there were quite a few absenteeism votes too. I wouldn’t count your 50 cent chickens until they’re all in the frying pan Murdo Girl.

Okay, okay…we’ll head over to the jailhouse and see what we can find out there.

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Well, Barney doesn’t look too worse for wear and Otis sure is cheerful..Wait..Otis? He’s standing outside..Then who is that in the cell?

Barney: Well, Otis, we will soon find out the fate of poor Barney Fife. Just because someone who can photographic draw really well, photographic- shopped my picture and made it look like I was with some ladies, when I was supposed to be dating Thelma Lou, I might get run out of this Murdo town.

Otis: Speaking of Thelma Lou, she and Louise already high tailed it out of town and Thelma Lou is the Chairwoman of the LWCC. Who do you reckon will be counting the votes Barney?

Just then, Barney turns and sees a man on the cot in Otis’s cell.

Barney: Who are you mister, and what are you doing in Otis’s, I mean the jailhouse cell?

The man in the cell: Well, I reckon it’s the law in this town that’s going to have to straighten this whole mess out.

All of a sudden the man in the cell jumps up and guess who it is?

Sheriff Duke: You see my saddle bag/bank bag I got right here? It’s got the results of the LWCC vote right inside.

This story will be continued in the very near future. Put all this information in a safe place in your rememberer, because I’m not going to summarize again. It’s just too much! Right Lav? It’s just too much!

Hear Ye, Hear Ye, Hear Ye…Deputy Barney Fife received ??? votes in the LWC Election