GOD BLESS AMERICA
It’s Monday morning at The Brick House. A couple of days have passed since the dance, and there’s still no sign of the Queen. A I and DM have been following up on the few leads that have trickled in, but they’re really no closer to finding her. Murdo Girl has been in the Oblong Office since the wee hours of the morning. She is very distraught over the Queen’s disappearance and has called in A l, the team Spy, Yram, the Crack- up Reporter, and DM, the Defense Manager. MG will be outlining her plan to solve this mystery.
Murdo Girl: We’ve got some serious problems and we need to get on top of the situation. Since Jerry didn’t have the beans to pay the phone bill on time, it’s been disconnected. I’ve been trying to get ahold of the Town Crier to do a “Hear Ye, Hear Ye, Hear Ye,” but I can’t find her either. Maybe I can get Carol to sing real loud.
On top of that, Coach Applebee is mad because we got his floor tarp dirty at the dance. Wasn’t the purpose of the tarp to protect his precious floor? What were we supposed to do put a tarp on the tarp?
Anyway, here are your assignments.
Yram, I want you to go over to the golf course and find the Coach. I hear he spends most of his time there now. Do one of your little crack-up interviews and find out how mad he is. Try to smooth it over… Now.. What’s that look for Yram?
Yram: (In a winey voice.) Geez Murdo Girl, do I have to interview him again? Remember last time when his face accidentally hit my microphone? He was pretty upset, and made it clear that I should go back to Texas where they shoot straight.
Murdo Girl: Are you sure you didn’t misunderstand? What exactly did he say?
Yram: He said, “Let me make this clear. You should go back to Texas where they shoot straight!”
Murdo Girl: Go talk to him anyway. Hopefully he’s hitting his golf balls straight.
Now, A I..Even though you have branched out to include spying, you are also still an Aggressive Informant. In fact, I’ve been giving some thought to promoting you to three initials. How does AIS sound to you? But first, here is what I need you to do. Go over to the jailhouse and do some snooping around. We don’t know what we’re dealing with here. Is it a conspiracy, or just a Lone Wolf? Even though the election is over, the Lone Wolf opposition could still be harboring some resentments.
A I: I’m on it MG. I’ll get Ole Deputy Barney Fife to speak into my watch. If he knows anything about the Queen and TC, I’ll get it out of him. I’ll even use my Dick Tracy decoder ring to get the combination to Otis’s cell and sneak in there and see if he’s heard any scuttlebutt.
Murdo Girl: Do what you can A I, but you won’t need your decoder ring, the key is hanging on a nail right outside the cell remember?
Now, DM…You are the Defense Monitor. You are in charge of our Neighborhood Security. Get Bart, Smart, Braveheart, and NoNo the dog. Make sure no one leaves this town until the Queen and TC are found. Ask Pico if she can talk Subway into giving you some more kiddie meals for lunch. We’re talking around the clock surveillance here.
DM: Consider it done MG..or should we call you Next Pres Murdo Girl, since we had the Inaugracorination and everything?
MG: That’s Too Much!! It’s Just Too Much!! Unless it’s a formal occasion, continue to address me as Murdo Girl or MG. This is going to be a casual Presidency.
Now Team Coyote…Let’s conclude this meeting with a quick huddle up..All hands in the center of the circle.
Go Team Go!!!
Just as the team leaves the Oblong Office, in walks NVP Lav, and she has something shiney in her hand.
Lav: Guess what MG! I was over at the RV Park visiting with some of my friends. I’ve been kinda missing the place since I became Next VP and got bumped uptown. I like my VP headquarters above Sanderson’s Store, but I just kinda miss hanging out at the park, and you know, the Pioneer Auto Museum is real close and that’s where the red convertible is..and
MG: Interrupting..Lav..I said Lav! What are you carrying? It looks like a bunch of tinfoil.
Lav: Remember where the Queen had her RV Carriage parked? She had that real neat spot with the 50 amp electrical hook-up…Anyway, her carriage is gone, and I found all this tinfoil lying around. I also found out the red convertible is missing from the museum, but that’s not all….
MG: What’s not all Lav?
Lav: Awhile ago, when I was coming up The Brick House walk, I saw someone tape this piece of tinfoil to the door. When he turned around, I got a real good look at him. He said, ” If you know what’s good for you, you’ll forget you saw me.” Then he took off running.
MG: Taking the tinfoil from Lav..There’s something written on here..It says, “I have the Queen and the red convertible! I know this place ain’t worth beans, I want something else. Wait for my call.” He had some colorful pens. Lav, you’ve been back for over an hour. Why didn’t you come and show me this right away?
Lav: Well, you know how I try to do what’s good for me like eat oatmeal and do Zumba. I tried to forget I saw him, but I just couldn’t.
MG: QUICK! We have to find Sherri. You can describe this guy and she can do a photographic drawing. I have to find Jerry too and make sure he paid the phone bill in case this guy calls! I’ll get Treason to put the wanted photographic drawing in the Coyote!
Meanwhile out at the Murdo Golf Course, Yram has tracked down Coach Applebee. Just in time too. It looks like he’s on the 18th hole getting ready to T off…
Yram: Coach Applefloor, I mean Applebee!! WHEOWHIT!!