Those 70ish Girls

The cast and crew got through the first day of filming the soon to be blockbuster movie,  Take 2, virtually unscathed. Lav (Dr. Longhorn) even came to in time for supper. It was sugar frosted flakes day, and that is her favorite day of the week.  Now, thanks to our Executive Producer, Stephanie Spielberg, and her twin sister, Sissy, we also enjoy tea and cake…often.

The Cowboy didn’t seem very impressed with the script, so he went out and hired a Writer person. She showed up today, with her script in hand. She seems to be up to the task. Her only request was she didn’t want to write the script in cursive… some sort of a childhood trauma thing. Let’s look in on take 2 of scene 1.

Director with a megaphone: Organ music please!! We want the music to start softly and CRESCENDO UNTIL IT GETS EVERYBODY’S ATTENTION!

Jerry the organ player: OKAY!! I brought my family of singers with me. For our first number, I will play and they will sing the ever popular organ tune, “Take me out to the ball game.” It has Take and to in the song. Don’t ya love it?

Executive Producer: I Love It!! Roll em..

Director with a megaphone: Excuse me Stephanie. That’s my line. I’m supposed to say when it’s time to roll. Where did you get the hat cake?

Executive Producer: We went to a garden party.

Jerry the organ player: Oh, we know that song…begins to play while his family sings Ricky Nelson’s, “Went to a Garden Party.” 

Writer: None of what just happened is in my script. Can’t you people read?

Several people roll their eyes, but they settle down and read their scripts.

MG/ small animal doctor Howliday: The dogs over there all have thick glasses on. Am I going to perform cataract surgery on them, so they can see better?

Casting Director: Not exactly…Our new script writer put a different twist on things. These dogs are playing blind dogs in the movie. They will each have a seeing eye person. You Dr. Howliday, are going to train the humans to work with blind dogs. The humans would be here too, but they’re all being fitted for harnesses. The dogs are getting used to wearing glasses. Later, we will train them to be blind.

Executive Producer Spielberg: You must be new to your craft writer person. PITA will be after you like ugly on an ape…oh sorry… that was not a PC, (Pet Correct) statement.

Writer person: Look at it this way Executive Producer, It will give some otherwise useless humans, a purpose in life.

Exec Producer: Oh…What kind of tea do you like Writer person? How about a red Bigelow? Tonight is pork and beans night.

Jerry the organ player: I hate beans…any kind of beans

 

I don’t want to be a blind dog with a seeing eye person that wears a harness, so I’m going to herd Buffalo for a living. Oh boy, here comes the Cowboy and he doesn’t look happy. Maybe I’ll stick around for a while.

The Cowboy rides in on his trike bike and pulls right up to the staging area. He gets off his ride and saunters over to the fake General Store. Everyone is holding their breath, afraid that he is having second thoughts about making a movie about two country veterinarians, and their feathered nests will lose their feathers. MG’s eye starts twitching, and The Exec Producer, her twin sister Sissy, the Director with a megaphone, AC, and the Writer person tremble with fear. Lav starts to cry….It’s raining.

Jerry the organ player and his family start to play and sing “Somewhere over the Rainbow.”

The Casting Director and the Camera person: Hey! you left us out!

 

These two play with people’s emoji’s

I like being the Tattler Cowboy…I have an assistant now to help me keep track.

**********************

Finally the Cowboy speaks

“We’re having one pepperoni pizza tonight”

So, as the sun sets on another south South Dakota evening, the cast and crew look forward to one pepperoni pizza night. They are blissfully unaware that someone is watching their every move. We’ll call him…The Phantom Wrangler.

 

Let me paraphrase what is happening today at the soon to be famous Cowboy Ranch. Everyone is twitterpated because today is the first day of rehearsal. Producer/writer Stephanie Spielberg finished writing the first scenes of the new movie and will be meeting with all the actors and crew to do a run through. The Cowboy plans to be there which is why everyone is a little nervous, and rightly so. He has the future of a great many people in his hands and nobody wants to mess up.

Hi…I’m the camera girl…my name is Kodak Kadoka. I was named after a camera and a town. I also do some freelance bull riding.

Producer Stephanie: I hope everyone is as excited as I am to start production on this fabulous movie. I’m sometimes amazed by my own talent. My sister, Sissy is going to give everyone a copy of the script, but don’t look at it until I say you can. Sissy, of course is the assistant of the director with a megaphone. Her full name is Sissy Spacek Spielberg, but we just call her Sissy.  We’re identical twins, except for my unfortunate musical birthmark.

Anyway…Have you all been given a script? Okay, let me explain the setting. We are all at the mansion which has been turned into a veterinary clinic on the inside. We’ve taken the back half of the place and turned it into an old country clinic with a barn outback. Dr. Longhorn and Dr. Howliday are still pretty poor, because people in the country, who live on farms and ranches, don’t like to share the wealth. They aren’t at all like our benefactor, the rich Cowboy. Oh, hi Mr. Cowboy, I didn’t see you there…how nice. The first scene takes place in a barn, with a cow who is having trouble giving birth. Lav, since you are playing the big animal doctor, you are helping poor Bessie or whatever her name is push that baby out!

Lav: How am I going to pretend I’m helping Bessie push her baby out, and it says here I only have one word to say…”Push!”

Producer Stephanie: Oh my dear, you won’t be pretending. There is a cow giving birth in the barn right now, just waiting for you to help her out. Didn’t I tell you I was good? As soon as we’ve filmed the scene, I’ll fix you some chamomile tea. Oh dear…I think that’s the wrong cow…yes it’s this cow over here.

 

Lav: Push Bessie Push. I can’t look, is she pushing?

Director with a megaphone: Cut! You said too many words. Stick to your lines please… Take two!

Lav: I don’t look cute. I would rather play a cute person. It stinks real bad in here!

 

Producer Stephanie: We’re going to have to take a break. The men are here to deliver the outhouse. It smells even worse than the barn. Maybe we should just ditch the Bessie giving birth idea. Maybe a horse…Would you like to help a horse, dear?

At about that time, Lav/Doctor Longhorn starts to scream. Help!! The baby cow is coming!! I don’t know nothin about birthing no babies. (I think Stephanie stole that line from Gone with the Wind).

Director with a megaphone: Start rolling, this could be it!! This is sensational…where’s Dr. Longhorn?

 

Tattletale Cowboy: I hate to tell on her, but I think she passed out!

Producer Stephanie seems to be nonplussed…Does anything get to her? The only thing that gives her away is all the tea she’s consuming. She won’t be able to stay away from the stinky outhouse tonight.

Producer Stephanie: Slurp..slurp, Well then, let’s move onto the small animals. They’re inside the fake clinic. Come MG/Dr. Howliday, you will be working on a dog with a highly contagious disease.

The Casting Director: I have been interviewing dogs all morning. He is by far the sickest.

MG/ Dr. Howliday: Yikes!! Is that dog really sick? How about I save a sick bear? We can use Odrum. He’s a small bear.

Executive producer Stephanie: Tea and cake time.!!!..Come on Sissy. Let’s start baking and brewing.

Good-bye

++++++++

This is hilarious…I said no to the sick dog part. Don’t tell the Tattler Cowboy where I am.

++++++++++++++++

You okay ma’am?

We’re auditioning for the small animal parts tomorrow

Well, as the sun sets on another beautiful South Dakota evening, We can reflect on today. We thought it went quite well didn’t you?

South Dakota Sunset by Amber Diehm

 

Who knew it took so many people to make a movie. I’m not just talking about the movie stars. There is a ton and I mean a ton of directors and producers needed to get it all done; and don’t even get me started on the assistants. We’ve picked up a few people, but I would still consider this to be a skeleton crew.

You have to hand it to Lav and MG…Even with a skeleton crew, they manage to be seen a lot. That director guy told them to ditch the crowns…It looks like that ain’t happening. On another positive note, the Cowboy has started to talk a little more. This morning, he said, “Don’t touch my Harley!!!”

Here comes everybody from breakfast. It’s cornbread day. (Pretty much everybody likes it, because they can get it to go for all three meals.) All of them are headed for the drawing room of the NRM. I get tired of writing, newly remodeled mansion, so I’m just going to say NRM. Hey!! There’s a couple of new people.

The director with the megaphone: CAN EVERYONE HEAR ME? It has come to our attention that in order to make a movie, you’re supposed to have a producer, so the Cowboy went out and hired one. She is so excited about joining the crew, but I heard she’s not too happy with the writers, which doesn’t make sense because we haven’t hired any yet. I would like you all to meet our new Executive Producer, and make-up artist, Stephanie Spielberg:

Stephanie Spielberg: Hi all…I’m so happy to be here at the Cowboy’s newly remodeled mansion to produce this exciting movie. I’m going to pass out a paper with a few bullet points listing my qualifications. Some of you might have heard of my cousin twice removed, Steven Spielberg. He’s not much to look at, but he’s very talented…and rich!

I will encourage the girls to wear their crowns. They might be veterinarians, but they’re not dead. Personally, I just love music. I always have a song in my head. I’ve even chosen the background music for our western.

• I have good creative vision. I can make up a good story at the drop of a hat.
• I’m self-motivated. I don’t even need an alarm clock.
• I’m good at motivating people. Who do you think got the assistant to serve cake? I will continue to support her by offering a calming chamomile  tea.
• I’m good at problem-solving. I will write the script…you’ll love it!
• I understand the creative processes of film making. Who interviewed the organist? Can he play saxophone, drums, piano and clarinet? I can teach him, and I’ll also throw in a few drum lessons.
• I have excellent communication skills. I talk on the phone, text, and talk on the phone.

Lav: Can I be excused? I have cornmeal stuck in my teeth.

TC: (She has been sitting there quietly.) I’m a town Crier. Can I have a part in the movie?

Stephanie Spielberg: Absolutely. What will it take for you to trade your cheese head in for a cowboy hat?

I’m the Tattler Cowgirl. I snoop around and tell on people. Don’t tell her, but I have my cheese head under my hat.

A I who used to be the Aggressive Informant is practicing to be an Air-born Cowboy in the movie. She flys around in an airplane and herds cattle. Sorry A I, I had to change your initials to AC. I think it sounds cooler anyway.

AC: I flew around this ranch all day, and I didn’t see one cow. Lav came with me and she didn’t see one cow either.

The Director with the megaphone: Lav’s dog Nincompoop drove a bunch of longhorns in here yesterday. If you two didn’t see them, you must have had something else on your minds.

AC becomes very quiet, and Lav already left to get the corn out of her teeth.

************************************

So the beautiful sun sets on another southern South Dakota day. I don’t know about all of you, but this thing is wearing me out. I almost forgot. We added to our staging and I heard tomorrow will be the first rehearsal.

Be there at sunrise

Photo of the sunrise by Dianna Kenobbie Diehm or Amber Diehm.

If they don’t give me my lines tonight, I’m going on strike, or my name isn’t Lucky, Soo’-TAH, Arf.

The background music for the movie…Take Two..A real western song. Straight out of Nashville.

**********************************

 

 

 

Well, the preparations to film the next blockbuster movie are underway. It sure is a good thing the Cowboy has a lot of cash. This cast and crew have never had a single one of their projects funded before, so they might kind of like the life of a star.

Meet the Cowboy…he rode into town on a Harley, named Wayne. Cowboy is his own man…kind of the John Wayne type, which is probably why he named his motorcycle Wayne. He’s a quiet guy, but when he speaks everybody listens. Just the other day he said, “Hi,” to me, and I’ve never forgotten it.

Today, we’re on location at the newly remodeled (on the inside) mansion belonging to the newly rich guy who calls himself, Cowboy. The name of the movie is Take 2, and it’s about two female country veterinarians. One of them specializes in large animals like cows and horses, and the other one takes care of all the little critters. Meet Dr. Longhorn in the purple gown, and Dr. Howliday in the shimmering red number. Wait!

Director: “Hey assistant!!!  Tell wardrobe to get some white doctor’s coats for the vets so this can be a little bit believable and girls…lose the crowns!!!…. Now where was I?”

Oh, yes…Lucky is played by Soo’-TAH who was played by Arf. He’s already kind of famous. You might remember him in the well known Dakota’s story. Lav and MG got to be the two main stars because they showed up with Lucky. So far he’s the only animal we’ve got. “Hey assistant!!! get some big animals and small critters in here for Sherri to audition. They don’t even need to be sick looking!! That’s what we’ve got makeup people for!!

Assistant: We don’t have any wardrobe or makeup people yet Mr. Director, sir. My sister is really good with eye-makeup, should I call her?

I’m the assistant..I like to assist and feed people cake.

Director person: Wait! I see a vehicle coming down the road and it’s kicking up dust. Is that Dr. Longhorn’s dog Nincompoop? Look she’s got some longhorns for Dr. Longhorn. What’s that other thing?

 

Dr. Longhorn: Ninny!!! You brought me longhorn cows…and Dr. Howliday her stuffed bear,  Odrum (Murdo backwards). Maybe we can get some sleep now. Did you bring my favorite pillow?

The Director: No  “ACTION “ for a minute, I’m going to get my bull horn.

 Sherri the casting director: Wait just a minute Mr. Director. I’m the Casting Director and I’m way ahead of you..just look at all of the animals I have auditioning.

And this is me with all of my assistants, makeup, and wardrobe people. I’m in Yellow.

Sorry folks…there seems to be a few kinks to work out. What next!

Hi my name is Rufferalla…They keep me in the basement of the newly remodeled on the inside mansion. I’d better get kicked upstairs real quick like or I’m going to bark to all of the newspaper boys and mailmen that come around here. HaBARK! HaBark! HaBark!

************************************

So…as the sun sets on another beautiful Southern South Dakota day, we appear to have some trouble brewing. I think I’ll just go on up to the newly remodeled on the inside mansion. I’m hungry and it’s mashed potatoes night.

Hmm: Looks like somebody broke down. I’ll go see if he needs some help. 

 

Things don’t seem quite right as we look in on the gang members participating in The Great South Dakota Road Trip. You will notice I changed the name, because it appears Lav and MG are never going to get out of South Dakota. Right now they’re staying in a boarded up hotel near White River. The Cowboy told  Lav and MG their entire entourage was there to make a movie, which was surprising to Lav and MG, since they didn’t know the gang was going to be in a movie. This should be interesting.

Lav and MG have been shown to their rooms.

Lav: (She’s pounding on MG’s door.) Let me in MG, please let me in! She screams Eeeeek!

MG: (Opens the door). Get in here quick! Are you scared because I’m scared…have you ever seen anything like this? Who would have thought there would be a big old spooky mansion clear out here in the middle of nowhere. It’s dirty too…the lady we worked for at the Chalet Motel sure wouldn’t have put up with this! At least we don’t have to worry about washing the windows.

Lav: Your room is a lot nicer than mine, MG. Where’d you get that red gown?

MG: My guess is that someone in the entourage told them I liked to wear long red formals and be in parades. Look around Lav and see if there’s a tinfoil crown too!

The Cowboy: (Over the intercom) Excuse Me!! You best come down the stairs you just went up, cause supper hour only lasts 15 minutes. The special tonight is scrambled eggs. Snowflake will seat you.

Lav and MG find the dinning room…no problem. They both get misty eyed as they anticipate seeing the gang again. It’s been a long time since yesterday. Hmm…the gang isn’t there, but it’s easy to see how Snowflake got her name.

Snowflake: Sit down wherever you want to. Just give me a minute to clear off the table. How many eggs do ya all want?

MG looks around the room and sees Queen E. sitting there. She kind of blends into the background, so it wasn’t easy to spot her unless you were really looking for her.

MG: Queen E. !! We are so glad you’re here aren’t we Lav? Where is the rest of the gang?

Queen E : Oh, they went to Pizza Hut. I should have gone with them. I forgot this was egg night. I was looking at the To Go menu, but all its got on it is fly specks and ketchup.

Lav: We heard through the rumor mill that we’re here to make a movie. That was a real happy surprise to MG and me. Who’s the star?

Queen E: I don’t know, Sherri is auditioning everyone. I wouldn’t look for a decision real soon though. You know how she likes to draaaw everything out!

Lucky: I’ve been standing like this for hours. I’m auditioning for a staring role in the movie.

Sherri the casting director: Scratch your left ear with your right paw and bark three times. Do you like to chase red frisbees? This movie requires a lot of frisbee catching,

MG: What’s the name of this movie anyway?

Cowboy: I believe I should answer that question. He saunters into the room like he owns the place.

I own the place and I have recently come into a chunk of change, so I’m investing it in a movie. I heard your help yourself to self help wasn’t exactly feeding the wolves, so I called and talked to Ruben. He said he’d send a bus full, and he did.

MG: Who is Ruben?

Lav: Don’t you remember MG? He’s the guy who answers the telephone.

MG: Everywhere?

Cowboy: As I was saying, I hired two extremely talented writers and told them I wanted a movie about two country veterinarians. You two came highly recommended. You’re the only ones who have a dog. If you want the part, you’ve got it!

Lav and MG: What? What? Wow! Wow! Jeez! Jeez!

Cowboy: Hold it! Hold it! The name of the movie is:

“Take 2”

Lav and MG: Love it! Love it!

Cowboy:  Ah…yah: Don’t say another 2 words. There are two vets….And what do doctors always tell their patients? Jerry the organ player walks in.

Jerry the organ player: (All movies have organ music in the background.) I know what they say: “Take 2 aspirin and call me in the morning…very clever,”

The organ might need a little tune up.

Well, as the sun sets on another beautiful South Dakota night, Lav and Murdo Girl decide to take the parts in the movie, which will most likely catapult them to instant fame and with fame comes fortune. Oh, they’re still going to do the road trip. This movie making thing is only only going to take 2 weeks, tops.

Photo by Dianna Kenobbie Diehm

Lav and MG had no earthly idea what the Cowboy was talking about when he said some of their “entourage” was already there. They didn’t want to look stupid or anything but it really couldn’t be helped; however, when he mentioned “on the house.” they knew right away that translated to, “Don’t say a word, it’s free.”

Lav and MG were shown to their rooms, and told supper would be served in the dining room at 6:00 o’clock, which would give them time to freshen up. When MG asked if pets were allowed, the Cowboy said, “You betcha little lady, I’m cooking Lucky’s steak bone right now. Will he get out of the river long enough to eat it?”

Lav: We don’t have a clue, Cowboy..we barely know him, but he’s helped us out a bunch on this long journey we’re on.

Cowboy: I can only imagine how grueling a long road trip can be. I won’t even travel on horseback anymore…course I’ve been having some arthritis flareups lately. A friend suggested I drink 47 juices, but I could only find 40 so I figured what’s the use?” How many miles have you covered?

Lav: Do you know where Murdo is? (At which time MG jabs Lav and gives her the “zip your lip” sign.)

MG: Can you tell us what members of our “entourage” got here before we did?

Cowboy: Near as I can figure, there are 3 directors, 5 makeup artists, 8 actors, 1 stunt person, a director, a photographic drawer, a gopher, and a location scout. I heard they already sent the scout back to Murdo. There’s some big Boy Scout doings this week-end. You will see everyone else at supper. I won’t be there. I’m saving myself for my audition tomorrow. See ya later.

Lav: Wait! Does this place have showers? I don’t like showers. Have you seen Psycho MG?

MG: Why would I see that Lav? I live it! I didn’t see any modes of transportation outside. How do you suppose all those entourages got to White River?

Lav: Why? Why? Why?

MG: Why what Lav?

1964 corvette…(Lav found this beauty parked in front of a hardware store…)

( police bullhorn) Lady, get away from the car…Do not make any sudden moves, and hand over your expensive purse, and those really cute flag shoes.

Lav: There are so many beautiful canary yellow corvettes out there. Why would they pick a VW bus?

MG: Oh jeez….It’s orange and black!! My fav colors!!

I’m the driver!

Well, the beautiful South Dakota sun sets on another White River day.

What will tomorrow bring for the adventuresome twosome and their entourage? Will they make it deeper into the deep South Dakota South, or will they take a right and go left? Will the entourage hold up, and what is the name of this movie being made? 

Cowboy: Don’t ask me…I’m just the Cowboy. I thought they’d like the deer horns in their hotel window. They called them antlers. Oh I’m still going to tryout for a part in the movie tomorrow. I know the producer, and he has good product…best you’ll ever find and it’s right there in the produce department. There’s nothing better than a homegrown tomato. I’ll get off my soapbox now.

Where did that cute Lucky go?   I’m Lucky..If anyone is looking for me, I’ll be in the 64 corvette.

Next: Let the auditions begin for the next blockbuster movie…Or the one we’re going to make.

Continuing on with the epic saga of MG and Lav and their odyssey into the deep South…Neither of these neophytes have ever been this far south before. What a great adventure they’re on. It’s Lav and MG, and their lucky dog Lucky. They only made it about thirty miles the first day, but that’s not so bad if you figure in some of the obstacles they’ve faced and surmounted. 

I wonder how far I can swim…I wonder how far Lav and MG can swim..or how fast or…where or…somebody slap me please!

They were given a broken down old red pick-up, no strings attached, by the Murdo Coyote Newspaper. The only caveat was they had to leave town, I mean take a trip and record every minute of every day. Later, it will be edited, I mean editorialized in the Murdo locals section.

Lav: Jeez MG, we’re all the way to White River. I didn’t know it was this big! According to this pamphlet I’m reading they’ve got 598 people living here. Hey MG..If we moved here they’d have an even 600. Awe..Do you think we should help them out?

MG: Not now Lav.. I’m so tired, I could sleep in a hay-field on a haystack right now, which isn’t such a bad idea. I wonder where people who don’t have any money stay…

Lav: Well, they stay at motels just like everybody else MG.

MG: Okay, lets look around for a decent place Lav. One thing is for sure, we’ve both cleaned a motel room or two haven’t we. Remember the Chalet?

Lav: How about that one on the right MG? It’s sure got a lot of stars!

MG: Pull on over Lav, I kind of like the rustic look of this place. I don’t think they sell gas though. Maybe Lucky can find some for us. I’m hungry are you Lav? Maybe Lucky can catch us some fish.

 Don’t look at me like that…

White River, “Where Prairie Skies Meet Western Life”

Located 23 miles south of I-90 at the junction of Highway 83 and 44; White River is a gateway to the Badlands and Rosebud Reservation. Settled in 1911, White River has become known as a favorite hunting area for grouse, pheasant, deer, varmint and wild turkey. Experience fishing, ranch vacations, rodeos, pow wows and other outdoor activities where the prairie skies meet western life.

It seems that Lav and MG’s luck continues to hold up. They park in front of the boarded up hotel and try to open the door, and it’s locked…but guess what? the doorbell works and a Cowboy says “howdy,” and lets them in. 

They promised the red truck would be garaged

Lav: We are here to visit your fair town, but we don’t have two nickels to rub together. We can sure make a mean bed though, can’t we MG? 

The Cowboy: Never you mind little lady, part of your entourage is already here….said you were scouting out movie locations. Everything is on the house! Oh, and we plan to put some windows in tomorrow…or the next day. You’re gonna just love White River. 

MG: Does White River have a water tower, Cowboy?

The Cowboy: We sure do miss. It would be my honor to take you and your crew over there to see it tomorrow..At your convenience of course.

So they all settled in for the night or maybe forever, who knows. I’ll find out tomorrow I guess, who is in the “entourage.” Right now, I don’t even want to know.

 

I can’t speak your language, but I can know your heart

This is the 3rd sunset I’ve watched since I got here. I love the river, but that isn’t why I came. I thought maybe you would be here fishing. I have watched the road every day for our old red truck, but you never came.

I knew you were really sick, because you stayed in bed, and you didn’t throw the ball to me, or give me treats from your plate. Now that I think about it, you hardly ever ate those last days you were home. I slept on that rug by your bed, day and night and every now and then, you would dangle your arm over the side and touch the top of my head. That was enough for me. 

Well, they took you away and they never brought you back. You were old and I’m still young. I know your heart…that’s how I know you’re never coming back.

Well, I guess I’d better find myself a new home. I hope I find one with kids this time. I like kids. I still have my collar on, so they will know my name is Lucky. I got my name because my owner’s last two dogs got run over and my owner thought I might be luckier if he named me Lucky. So far, it’s worked. Well, guess I’ll take one more swim before I head down the road.

Hey..I hear my truck! Here comes the old red truck! I know you’re not coming back, but the least I can do is look after our truck.

You said you wanted a family with kids, Lucky. Are you talking mind or body? Maybe you should have been more specific.

Sure enough…here comes the truck and it’s sputtering and coughing like it has a bad case of vehicular pneumonia. Well it stopped. It either died or it needs a rest.

Lucky: Hey…two ladies just got out of my truck..and they slammed the doors. “Hey ladies!! Don’t be slamming my truck’s doors.” I better get over there.

Lav: Finally…the noises this truck was making have stopped. Good! I couldn’t stand much more of that coughing and sputtering, and lurching and lunging and…

MG: Stop Lav! I liked all of that noise; at least we knew the thing was running. It’s quiet now all right, but it also quit going down the road! Are we out of gas already? Hey! what’s that dog doing? He just jumped into the back of the truck. Who does he think he is anyway?

The name is Lucky, which you will find out as soon as you get smart enough to read my tag, which should be any day now. I’m just getting back here to point to the gas can. It was full last time I was in this truck. 

Yup! There it is, right where we left it and it’s still full of gas. Well are you gonna lift it out of here and put it in the truck? I’m just a dog ya know. I can’t carry your gasoline.

Lav: Hey look MG!! That dog found gas! We’ll be coughing and sputtering down the road again in no time. We’re already 20 miles from Murdo too. We’re all the way to the White River. We’ll be in Kadoka in no time.

MG: I don’t think this dog has a home. He looks like he’s been swimming in the river for days.. We’re bringing him with us. He can sit right up here in the middle. We are so lucky he found that gas! Yup we’re sure lucky!

Lucky: HUH?

MG: What map are you looking at Lav? Kadoka is way west of Murdo. We’ve been going South.

Lav: Well, I like the South don’t you? Tonight I’m going to write a letter to all of our friends and tell them we decided to go south. I wonder if Murdo misses us yet?

MG: No…probably not yet…I’ll drive Lav…You rest. I see we have a spare tire.

Meanwhile…the town of Murdo is looking for Lucky👀.

 

One of our neighbors put on the most amazing fireworks display Saturday night. It was like an hour long grand finale. He told Kip he has done this for the past thirteen years.

When I saw those fireworks exploding in the sky, I thought about the star

G

I’m rerunning this because it has the 4th of July in it. The someone referred to at the end is the mysterious cowboy.

 

Lav and MG’s Great American Road Trip

 

They aint exactly Smokey and the Bandit, or Thelma and Louise

But nicer road hogs you’ll never find, they even say thanks and please

Someone said they hit the road on the morning of July one

By the fourth they’d be in Rapid City for some 4^th of July fun.

Well they circled Murdo a couple of times, then stopped to have some lunch

Someone at Fern’s kicked them out. No money would be my hunch

Someone said they had no gas, but that could be just a rumor

Someone told ‘em,..Go to Dean’s 66, he’s got a sense of humor

So they pulled into Dean’s 66 and said.. please fill er up

Someone said, you two again? You’d better just give it up

Well next door is the Auto museum, and they recognized their truck

Someone said Ruben took the keys. Now how’s that for real bad luck?

Saaay, Murdo Girl said to Lav, how we gonna hit the road?

Someone said, they might just haf’ta put their trip on hold.

Lav said, we need some cash MG. How can we get a sackfull?

Someone said to go on back to Fern’s only this time be more tactfull

Fern’s will give ya free bus tickets. Now wouldn’t that be nice?

Someone told them their luck was changing. A free ticket’s worth half the price

This dang poem goes on and on, I thought I’d never quit scrollin

Hey, Lav and MG, stay away from someone, cause he don’t seem worth knowin.

Who is this mystery guy I ask ya? He must have a bone to pick

Cause MG and Lav are still in town..the free ticket at Fern’s was a trick.

 

Makes ya proud to be an American don’t it?

 

 

 

 

 

Kip mentioned several week ago that our house was dirty. I told him I would take a look at it the first chance I got. I had a little bit of extra time yesterday, so I looked at it. He was actually being generous when he said it needed to be cleaned. By the way, he is not being chauvinistic, he works circles around me…makes me dizzy and we all know I don’t need that.

You know your house is dirty when you have to vacuum absolutely everything. I’m talking about the things that need dusting. I needed to vacuum before I could dust. I couldn’t do that yesterday because low and behold…my last vacuum cleaner bag was full, which meant I had to go to Walmart, who didn’t have them, and then to Lowe’s who didn’t have them either. When I came home bag-less, Kip got online and ordered some. I told him I really couldn’t clean until July the 3rd when the bags get here. Since the 3rd is the eve of the 4th of July, I will probably wait until Wednesday, unless I’m too tired from the holiday. We don’t have any big plans so it should all work out…Hold on a sec…Queen E is here.

“I’m Here to celebrate the 4th of July!!”

“Oookay? I see you brought some fireworks with you. That’s an ewe & awe hat if I ever saw one.”

Anyway, while I was out looking for bags, I went to three different stores to find a mandolin food slicer. I forgot to look at Walmart while I was there, and I didn’t want to go back because it’s on the other side of town and the traffic here is terrible. Everyone is playing on the lake this week-end. I also went to Goodwill which depressed me, so after three hours, I came home with nothing…What’s your question Queen E?

“What is it you blokes celebrate on the 4th of July??”

“Have you not heard of the Revolutionary war? It broke out in April 1775, but at the time, not many colonists desired complete independence from”Great Britain,” and those who did were considered radical…but, by the middle of the following year, many more colonists had come to favor independence, because of growing hostility against Britain and the spread of revolutionary sentiments such as those expressed in the bestselling pamphlet “Common Sense.”

Like I was saying…The reason Goodwill depressed me is because the last three or four times I have been there, I couldn’t find anything to buy. I have so many clothes now I’ll never be able to wear them all. It seems like such a waste to take them back to Goodwill and donate them.  I must have at least $150.00 tied up in all that stuff, and I have purchased every bunny rabbit, Angel and doll (both ceramic and stuffed), I can fit into my house. It’s not good to start collecting things when you’re sixty-five  nearing retirement and have already downsized.

We don’t need anything for the RV, because Kip has the same problem I do, and he’s already loaded it up with stuff. The first time we took it out, we had to go to a big rig truck stop and weigh it. We were 900 pounds over, so we had to get rid of some things we decided we wouldn’t be using that much. I don’t remember now what we got rid of, but I haven’t wished we still had something we donated to the church garage sale, so we must not have needed it…. I’m really sorry, she just keeps talking.

“What’s that you say? I’m not the Queen of America?”

I’m going to try to ignore her. Speaking of the church garage sale. I bought a really cute summer cloth bag that a friend of mine made. She made several to donate to the Country Store fundraiser. When I walked into Lowe’s yesterday, a male employee… kind of a big guy, came over to me and said, “I just love your Vera Wang. I was thinking today, I should have sold it to him for $100.00, but that wouldn’t have been the right thing to do. Barbara, if you are reading this, I would never part with my Vera Wang bag. I have washed it three times and it still looks great!

Even though I couldn’t vacuum or dust, I haven’t been sitting around doing nothing. I beat Kip to the punch. He mentioned the other day that I should take the bed out of the guest room, because I had so much of my blog story stuff around, the bed just took up space. Of course we can’t do that because Gus, Val, and a few others sometimes come to visit. I hope they like Beasterhops. I know you do Val.

I know there’s a bunch of water towers I haven’t named yet around here somewhere. Where did Queen E go?

“She left with Lav”

Uh, Oh…something tells me I’m going to get a nasty letter, and I’m such a sucker for George. When the Queen finds out that George Washington was the first President of the good old USA, they’ll probably change his name.

“Come with us Queen E. What you need is a new crown hat.”