My name is Pattie Ruth, and I have a story to tell. We had to leave our cold, dark, house and find a new place to dwell.

I thought I had it made here. My humans have been pretty nice, but now I know the truth. This is a fool’s paradise.

We have no water or power. We slept in the car one night. I don’t understand why it’s dark in the house and outside it’s all white.

My humans said we can’t sleep here with two dogs and a cat in the car. The closest room was in Canton so we slid there and that’s where we are.

I hate walking through the snow. It really slows me down. My humans say the problem is that I’m built too close to the ground.

I pray all my animal friends can stay warm when it’s cold day and night. If it keeps on snowing we’ll all be snow dogs. Do teeth made of coal bite?

My name is Dollie Lee and I’m not a happy cat. We’re all living in a bedroom…What’s up with that?!

I guess we couldn’t pay to keep the water on and the heater and the lights have been… long gone.

I think my humans must have run out of dough, because we left town in a hurry and had to drive through all the snow.

I think they owe some bad guys and the money must be due. My humans didn’t know how fast the interest would accrue.

For three days all they ate was…PB & J…I tried to think of something that might…save the day.

Do you know what I find to be a little bit ironic? They just blew all their cash on burgers at the Sonic.

I made sure I told the dogs that we were really poor. I said we couldn’t buy those fancy bones… anymore.

I’d better take my little catnap in the sun… before I go to the bank and set up my… “Help Dollie Fund.”

I get emails from people who are trying very hard to find a way for me to make money writing. I know they’re sincere. Why else would they be so persistent? I don’t know how they came to know about me, but there is a bunch of helpful people out there.

I must confess, I don’t read all of the emails, but I do save them to read at a later time. Oh my, I just looked and there are two thousand and four of them. I decided, that rather than saving more, I would read today’s suggestions.

Did you know the books that are on fire right now are horror stories. Yes…if I write a real scary story, I could make millions. I don’t even have to know that much about horror to write a marketable story. All I have to do is pay $365 in 3 installments to learn how. If it were 6 installments, I might consider it, but since this is the first of the two thousand and four emails that I have actually read, I think I should go back and look for something that will make me rich for a more reasonable fee.

Here’s one that’s pretty interesting. How to Sell Your Story to Hollywood!
(or: What Will Doom It to Eternal Obscurity?)

Ken is going to host a webinar. He has sort of produced thirty movies. He could very well make my book into a Hollywood hit! I’m thinking, “The Beasterhop goes to Hollywood” has a ring to it. Ken will teach me how to turn my manuscript into a movie script for a fee of $699.00…up front!

This email caught my eye…

Hi,

As you know I’m a big fan of reading biographies and autobiographies of great authors.

I’ve found that you can often learn a lot by studying the lives of writers.

Well, the other day I learnt another great tip, and I want to share it with you.

I replied to his email. I said for a fee of $200 paid in 3 easy monthly installments, I would teach him what I have learnt about the importance of editing.

You know what they say. “Those who can’t do, teach.”

I’ve read twenty-five from the two thousand and four helpful people and call me cynical, but I haven’t found anything I can take to the bank.

Guess I’ll go back and work on my vision board…but first I have to drive over to the gas station and get my Lotto Texas winning ticket. There-in lies my hope…

I woke up this morning with a song stuck in my head.

I thought about the tune and what the lyrics said.

“Who’s gonna fill their shoes?” Is a favorite song of mine.

I love to hear George sing it with his old familiar twang.

“Who’s gonna fill my shoes?” I had to ask myself.

I know the day will come when they put me on a shelf.

I’ll sit there with my books. I won’t be blogging anymore.

I won’t be writing poems or having tea parties galore.

Who will take my place? No one sings like I do.

What about my stories? I have more than just a few.

Is there a younger girl out there who can fill my shoes,

While I watch from my shelf and only sing the blues?

I kept hearing the song. It was now burned in my brain.

Then a thought came to me. I’ll need lots of time to train.

I’ll teach her about Arf, Pearl the human and Pearl the dog.

What about Lav and Yram and other characters in the blog?

It will take me several years to get her up to speed.

Then I’ll retire to the shelf and have some time to read.

I hope I won’t be sitting there all by lonesome self.

I sure don’t want to sit beside that silly Christmas Elf.

I guess I’ll write a story before my blogging time expires

About someone who sits on the shelf after she retires.

What did you forget to tell/ask your mother? Here are a few things I have thought about…

What was your most embarrassing moment?

If I had to guess it would be the time you failed algebra. You sat with the seniors at the student assembly even though you couldn’t technically be a senior until you passed. You said the juniors called you out on it. They said you were supposed to sit with them.

I need a little clarification.

You said boys were easier to raise than girls so I prayed for and had two boys. Later, I married a man with two young daughters. What you told me wasn’t true. You couldn’t have known, I guess. You were 7 1/2 years younger when you had Billy. Never mind.

I know you loved to read, but why did you only read biographies and autobiographies?

Why did you go to bed when there was only ten minutes left of the movie you were watching on television?

Apparently, when Grandpa raised horses and you lived on horse creek, you were mean to the Osborne kids. What did you do to them? You were only eleven when you all moved to town, and they said you were the only one they weren’t going to miss.

Did Grandma Sanderson know how to sew, knit and crochet? Mrs. Theisen said you Sanderson girls never learned how to do anything useful. I think she was wrong…although I never learned how to do any of that, and I didn’t learn how to cook, either. It’s okay. I can make a mean bed and clean a commode from my motel room cleaning days.

Who did you really give my pompoms to?

Here is something I didn’t know about you. Billy said you weren’t allowed to play cards when you were growing up. You didn’t even know the four suits. The only card game you ever learned how to play was bridge. You had no desire to learn any other game, because no other game could possibly be as intriguing as bridge.

I really admired you for your business acumen. You and Gus kept the motel in top notch condition and you knew when to sell it.

You could have written a book with all of your idioms. I still remember many of them because most of them had a “not so hidden” lesson. Others were just short ways of stating the obvious.

Water seeks its own level. We shall see what we shall see. Everyone has their own cross to bear. Always show your best side. Always put your lips (lipstick) on. When you get five dollars, you don’t have to always put it on you or in you. He/she is having a mad hot. (Billy said I started that one.)

Thank you for giving us all so many amazing memories. I wish I had asked you more questions, Mom.

This song describes a dramatic experience that really could happen to anyone. Thank you Lady Jules CB for giving me this gift. I will always treasure it as I’m sure you will treasure my beautiful rendition of “Oh my Faux Pa.”

You even had to stand up to the Facebook police who wanted to remove this beautiful song because they thought you were bullying me… just because you said my roots were white. Few people have such courage.

I would like to dedicate this to Shelli and Sherri who are having a birthday today. They are sisters and twins and truly wonderful people and great friends with a wonderful sense of humor…Right?

The words to the song in case you would like to attempt to sing along…

• 

• 

This poem is from the heart. I wrote it because I know there are others like me who have a difficult time finding the right words to say to someone who is grieving.

Sometimes when our eyes are closed, we can see much better

I can’t seem to find the words, so let’s do this together

We can sit here quietly and I’ll take your hand in mine

I’ll look inside your hurting heart and see what I can find.

I see the one you’re missing is right where they belong

They want you to know they have been there all along.

See them fill it up with all the love they have to give..

They want you to remember, in your heart is where they’ll live.

Let’s sit here a while longer. You can tell me what you see

A smile, a laugh a wink… a treasured memory?

Remember all those things you thought you never would forget?

The good and maybe bad times. And it’s not over yet.

One thing about memories…you’ll recall the cream of the crop

Because the bad ones sink to the bottom and the good ones rise to the top.

When our eyes are closed, we can see a little better.

Let’s keep them closed a little while and say a prayer together.